Who do YOU want to be for your spouse?

Mark Driscoll said on Facebook recently, "You should stop making a list of what you want in a spouse and start making a list of you want to be for your spouse."

Wow, if that doesn't garner a second thought from the majority of people, I don't know what will.

It's interesting, because this links back to another great quote that I've heard before: "I want my woman's heart to be so lost in love with the Lord that I have to go to Him to find it."

In both of these quotes it's all about taking personal responsibility for who your spouse is going to be and how you are going to find each other. Although more subtly in the second, the resounding message is: go seek the Lord and be refined in Him! Then you'll attract who you're truly looking for. The beautiful, Godly spouse that you want to marry won't take a second glance at you unless you have similar qualities and standards in your own life.

And that's how I want it. I honestly don't want my woman to be distracted by me. I hope that her heart is so deep in love with the Lord that she doesn't take a second glance at me until the Lord prompts her to.

The relationship we were designed to have with our spouse was never meant to slow us down in our pursuit of the Lord. Rather, we should yoke together with someone who is sprinting at the same pace and loves the Lord with all of their heart.

One day, I want to simply look beside me and see a woman who is fervently pursuing the Lord as hard as I am. Then, I'll go back to Him and ask that she might be mine in confidence that our whole would be greater than the sum of our singleness.

So, where does that leave me today? Content with my singleness. Seriously! Not only that, but my deep in my heart I want to surrender my singleness to Him that I might seek first the Kingdom ever more fully and love Him ever more deeply.

Besides, if I were to truly seek Him first, then all of this will be added unto me! And even if it's not what I hope it would be (or even a spouse) then I will be able to be content because ultimately it's all a loss for the sake of knowing Him.

How do you view relationships? Are you out looking for someone? Or are you focused on making yourself that someone worth finding? How would God want you to be?